Total Body Radiation
Yesterday Harvey got the last of his preconditioning treatments: 200 cGY of total body radiation. This is a small dose, compared to 2,000 cGY (or thereabouts) of radiation given in full myeloablative transplants.
“cGY” is abbreviation for centi-Gray. These units of radiation are named after Dr. Gray, a pioneer in the field. A “centi-Gray” is one hundredths of a “Gray”. For comparison, a chest X-ray is between 4% - 5% of a cGY. So, even with this mini-allo approach, Harvey got radiation dose the equivalent of 4,000-5,000 chest X-rays. Just in case you missed the point up to now, transplant preconditioning is not something you would do just for laughs. This is pretty hairy stuff!
The immediate after effects of the radiation therapy is fatigue. Harvey was more tired than I have ever seen him in the past 38 years of his life. We let him sleep it off, there is not much else to do about it. We are told that a couple of days later we can possibly look forward to mucositis (sore mouth) and the painful inflammation can happen all the way from one end of the GI tract to another, making it hard to eat and do other stuff. Not to worry, the dietitian was quick to reassure us, they will be more than happy to feed him through a tube, just another bag hung up on the infusion pole that already looks like a Christmas tree with too much stuff hanging on it. If eating gets really poor, there is nothing wrong with getting supplementation via the iv tube, to keep nutritionl needs in balance. In Harvey’s case, home made yogurt seems to work and we are happy to keep him well supplied on that front.
Encounter At High Noon
Today was the big day, the day Harvey was scheduled to say hello to two very nice baby cords (one from the Puget Sound Cord bank, and one from the Carolinas. A matched pair, a boy and a girl). It is a toss up which cord will win in the end as the one that engrafts and becomes his new immune system. Will it be a girl or will it a boy? Will Harvey suddenly develop a taste for down south cooking, or will he long for more rainy days than we normally see in sunny Sedona? Just kidding.
The next part is going to be tough for me to write, and may be tough for you to read – consider yourself warned. But we did promise that we will tell it like it is, the good, the bad and the ugly. I am sorry to say the actual process of the transplant was not a tranquil and spiritually uplifting experience. It was, to put it mildly, a stressful and somewhat scary experience. I am still reeling from it.
Right on schedule, the two cords showed up in Harvey’s room, accompanied by a nurse and a nurse-in-training. No expert doctors, no attending fellows, no nurse practitioners. Not that we were looking for VIP treatment or a chorus of heavy weight experts to watch over the process they have done dozens of times, but I have to admit I was taken aback by the somewhat less than expert guidance available for the process. We were offered spiritual hand holding in terms of a priest, rabbi, shaman or what ever, but we would have far preferred the reassurance of clinical expertise. They were familiar with the process, but we were doing it for the first (and hopefully the last) time!
We had some questions about the cords themselves. I made sure that the ID numbers of the cords matched with the information I had obtained from my prior correspondence with U of Minnesota. After all, shit happens and I wanted to make sure there were no “OOPS!” moments on this very important day. They ID numbers matched and these were indeed the chosen cords. So far, so good.
But the crucial “Total nucleated cell dose” (an indication of the number of stem cells available) cited on the two cord blood unit bags were significantly smaller than the numbers we had been given earlier. Now, jumping forward to a post I have yet to write, the total nucleated cell (TNC) dose in the cord blood is one of the most important things when it comes to successful transplant and patient survival. The double cord program at the U of Minnesota was developed precisely because they realized early on that the cell dose available in one single cord is most often not big enough to transplant adult patients, there are not enough stem cells there, two cords transfused together got over that hurdle. Knowing that, you can imagine I was chagrined to see the much smaller numbers on the cord bags. I am talking of roughly 40% reduction in the combined dose of the two cords, compared to the information I had on my handy dandy spreadsheet.
After the rent-a-doc and dirty lab coat incident of last Sunday, I was determined to be more assertive. The nurse did not know the answers to my questions about the cell dose, lady I just work here and that is not part of my job description. Fair enough, I can live with that. But what was harder to swallow was the single minded insistence that he was there solely to get his job done, and that took precedence over any questions we had. Yes, the nurse practitioner is around some where, and yes, the attending doctors were on the floor doing their rounds, and they will stop by and by. But now we have to get on with the cord blood infusion, with or without patient’s sense of comfort.
Eventually, after the two cords had already been infused into Harvey, the nurse practitioner dropped by and she too did not know the answer to our question about the drop in cell dose, she does not get involved in all that cell dose stuff. OK, we got in touch with the lady who is in charge of the cord matching, the one who initially gave us the detailed information. Did she have an answer for us? You guessed it, she just takes care of the paperwork, she too did not know how much of the precious TNC is lost during the process of thawing out the frozen cord blood. Going up the chain of command, we tried to reach our specialist, who would certainly have known the answer. But too bad, he was on his way to Italy and not reachable for the next week or so. Surprise! We were not aware that was going to be the case.
Finally, we did reach a doctor (Thank you, VB! You are a lovely lady) who was willing to call around, talk to the lab folks in cell processing and get us some answers. Yes, in the process of working up the frozen cords, as much as 30-60% of the TNC is lost. Wow. I have worked in labs most of my life, even though they were chemistry labs and not medical / biological labs. That kind of loss in precious end product would have raised some eyebrows in my lab, we would have been looking for ways to improve the processes to reduce losses. I don’t know enough about the processes involved in this situation to hazard a guess whether this is pretty much standard operating procedure in all cell processing labs, whether there is room for improvement.
The Second Shoe Drops
Just when we were winding down from the unexpected excitement of the day thus far and dealing with the disappointment of smaller TNC dose than we expected, the attending physician and fellow dropped by. Guess what, there was much more significant bad news. With a grave face, the attending physician informed us that the cell proessing labs had called in and had flagged one of the cord blood units that had already made its way into Harvey’s system. It seems there was a nick in one of the bags. Or there was a nick in the cryo bag that was supposed to keep the cords safely frozen. But don’t worry, we don’t think the nick actually penetrated all the way, we don’t think there is any real risk of contamination. But just to be on the safe side, we will have Harvey on mega dose of Vancomycin (a powerful broad spectrum antibiotic) twice a day for the next seven days. Bummer!!! Especially if it means Harvey would have to deal with antibiotic induced diarrhea for the next seven days!
So, when did they know about this little problem with the nicked bag that may or may not have contaminated one of the cord units? Who knew about it, who did they inform, when did they inform whoever they informed, and how was it we patient / and his family were not informed about it until after the fact? The details are a little murky right now. But this much is crystal clear. Cell processing labs did what they are supposed to do, called in and flagged their concern well before Harvey’s transfusion started. If they thought it was important enough to flag, and the attending physician now feels it is important enough to order double daily dose of Vancomycin for seven days to protect against potential bacterial contamination, I am blown away that they did not bring this to the attention of the patient before the cord units were infused. Informed patient consent is a joke in the absence of timely information, don’t you agree?
Somewhere, some how, some one made the wrong call and the process failed. Would we have gone ahead with the transfusion if we had been told? I honestly don’t know the answer to that question. Given the fact that he had already been “preconditioned”, there was little choice but go forward. I suppose I would have asked a few more questions on the exact status of the plastic bag, tried to get a better assessment of the risks before we decided whether one of the back-up cords have been a better choice given the circumstances?
As it is, we were not given the choice. We were informed about this potential unanticipated risk only after the fact, after the two cords were already circulating within Harvey’s deeply immune compromised body. Wish us luck, guys. Perhaps this will be no more than a bad dream, a hiccup that will go away with no more consequences than a day long splitting headache and acid stomach for yours truly. The next couple of weeks would have been anxious ones in any case as we wait for engraftment to happen, now the anxiety level has been kicked up a couple more notches. Harvey was cool as a cucumber. Could be he was calm under pressure, or could be the pre-medications had kicked in and nothing was going to get his dander up. To tell you the truth, I too would have liked a nice little oxycodone pill myself, with Benadryl chaser.
Shit Happens In The Real World
And squeaky wheels get heard. Since the uproar of this afternoon, we have been visited by the Nurse Manager as well as the Senior Director of Blood and Marrow Transplant Services. Both ladies listened carefully and were gracious, candid and sincere in telling us that there will be a review of the events of the day and they will get back to us with the results of their review process. Shit happens, in spite of best efforts. All of us who have been around the block a few times know that. But what sets apart the good institutions from the also rans is how they handle themselves when shit happens. We are sorry that Harvey was at the pointy end of this particular snafu, we would much rather have had an uneventful and boring DAY ZERO. It was not to be. Now, what matters is that we patients and the institution learn from the incident, so that patients coming down the turnpike in future have a better shot of having uneventful and boring cord blood infusion days.
Stay tuned folks. I have done my bit by reporting the facts as they happened, so that you guys can learn from our experience. I will be sure to tell you how all this plays out from an institutional perspective. Judging from what I know thus far of University of Minnesota Fairview Hospital, I am betting on their improved efforts, candid acknowledgement and transparency.
And oh yes, we were told today that the Vice President in charge of rent-a-docs will be informed about the guy in the dirty lab coat on Sunday.
So went our DAY ZERO.
Be well,
Chaya
18 comments on "Day Zero"
Follow-up comment rss or Leave a TrackbackChaya
I had checked the web site a few times today regarding Harvey’s status. I am so very sorry to hear about the issues today, I was really hoping for a non-eventful transplant. Hopefully, these issues shall pass with good results for Harvey. Our love, best wishes & prayers are with you both for great recovery.
Serena -
Thank you again for your comprehensive reporting. I’ll be leveraging your example as a learning experience to try to make my Day-0 (in just over a week) be uneventful.
All the best to both Harvey and you.
“Richard”
I must say, Chaya, that this Serena person - wherever you found her - is truly amazing. I don’t think one could ask for a better caregiver. On the ball, analytical, and with fantastic instincts… be sure to tell her to keep on squeaking!
Serena, So, the most crucial moment in a CBSCT can happen without any ‘in charge’ medical professional in the room to check out the patient, the product and the details BEFORE the transfer of cells? It is strange and surprising to read about possible contamination news reaching the patient’s room after the fact. I guess, there will always be something we don’t think to ask. More disturbing then the hoped for institutional transparency, is the question of how this would have been handled were you not the expert you are. For us, mere mortals, it is a stunning reminder that our ‘hero’ and ‘heroine’ have been subjected to such events. . . .I am awed by your spirit and humbled by your experience. Your cohort is deeply grateful for your journal and hopes all will be well for Harvey from this point forward. ncd
I am ashamed of my home state where “Minnesota nice” turns into “Minnesota careless”. Hope you all can weather the storm. Love, Beckmark1
Way to go girl!!! It is too bad you have to check so much because people are not doing their jobs. But thank you for giving it to us the way it is. Hopefully all will go well from here. My prayers are with you.
Harvey is blessed to have you, Chaya. Hopefully, there was just a tiny nick in the bag, and not something that permitted contaminatation to the stem cells. That problem could be resolved if the plastic bag could be retrieved and examined. They dropped the ball and you need answers regardless of what choices you may have made. You were not informed about possible options. What about talking to the chief of service?
Chaya, I am so sorry for the unnecessary stress and fear that this lack of attentiveness to crucial detail has caused you both. May this be a brief storm before the sun shines permanently.
Wow Chaya—-I am blown away. Well, I wish I could say that I have never heard of such mistakes in a hospital of such, but….like you said, “shit happens”. I am proud of the way you handled this and I am proud that you posted it all for the World to read. I hope that somewhere today you found at least a glass of wine to throw down. I often have to remind myself that we are all pioneers. New medicines, transplants, where just a few decades ago, there was no option. You are one of the great Pioneer’s of our cancer. A position not many can or want to hold. We all give you our heartfelt thanks. Tell Harvey to hang tough.
Jenny Lou Park
Chaya and Harvey,
Jenny Lou could not have said it better. Our doctor’s goof-ups pale in comparison with what has happened to you two. Barb and I are sending our prayers your way every day. Chaya, please take a moment or twenty for yourself as you have told me several times. Heaven knows you don’t need this stress nor obviously does Harvey need these complications.
You are an inspiration to us all. Give yourself and Harvey a hug from us!
Steve and Barb Grice
Serena,
Whether you plucked that name out of the bag marked “Distilled Irony” or the bag marked “a’berah k’daberah” (what I speak I create), I do not know.
You and Harvey are surely the most knowledgeable CLL patient and patient-spouse most hematologists/oncologists have ever encountered. Yet I doubt that even you guys would have imagined that Harvey’s brave and calculated leap would provide such evidence that undergoing treatment for CLL and its cousins can be an extreme sport.
Your ability to write about this disturbing experience while it is so fresh and still reverberating in your entire being, and to do so with clarity and with thoughtful analysis — and without @#$!$^%@&* — is remarkable and inspiring to everyone. More important, Harvey benefits simply by knowing that such a person as you are near him, looking out for him, and caring for him. Everyone who knows about you two is pulling for Harvey and wishing you and him all that is conveyed by your name.
— Jon
Sorry you two had such an eventful day, what a series of events! I believe that all workers in the chain should have a working knowledge of what the !@#! they are doing there. So many times the problem could have been caught and assessed BEFORE the transplant, but the employees are all single minded and single trained! Tell these people that step one to a checks/balances system is for every employee down the line to have a working knowledge of the whole. As patients we have had to learn all of this, they can learn it too! I hope you will be able to calm down after this storm Chaya. I am only glad that the premeds kept dear Harvey from getting stressed. Now if they would just share those premeds with you!!!
Love to you both. Beth
Chaya and PC, this log with the nitty gritty of the cord transplant is a gem. I thank you very much for providing the details and the insights. I hope the writing process is theraputic for you. Above all, please keep up the good job on your oversight and may you have great success in the end which is what counts.
Best wishes,
Diane MacKinnon
Thanks for all the comments and support! Keeping this journal updated is very much a two way street. I hope you guys are getting something out of it. I know I am. Reading what you have to say keeps me grounded and a whole lot less lonely. Please keep it up - it is deeply appreciated.
Hospitals can be intimidating places. As soon as they put that plastic ID bracelet on your wrist, the institution and their processes take over. Even with the best of intentions and in the best of institutions, it is easy for the lone patient voice to get lost. Especially if that patient is drugged up to the eyeballs. One obvious lesson learned: if at all possible, make sure there is a strong and involved family member or advocate present to speak up for the patient. Maybe once we are all done with Harvey’s transplant I should hang out my shingle as a professional patient advocate, ready to be hired by other CLL patients. Right. I can imagine various doctors cringing at the thought!
Looking over my post there is one thing I would like to change. My comments about nutritional supplementation is out of line. Often, patients undergoing extensive therapy suffer from mucositis - sore mouth and ulcers along the GI tract are common. And yet it is important to keep up the level of essential nutrition. There is absolutely nothing wrong about getting intravenous supplementation to keep things on an even keel. I apologize for the flip comment on that front. I have edited it out that bit, so that people reading this post in the future do not have to deal with my unjustified snippy comment on that front.
There seems to be no end to the incompetence, or lack of attention to detail (to put it politely), in medical institutions. Good ones, bad ones, middling ones. I cringed as I read every line of your entry, felt a lump in my throat, and I wasn’t even there to experience it all in real time. One lesson I get from this is that no matter how prepared we are there are always things we don’t know to expect. Who knew there was cell loss in thawing frozen cords? Who knew that nicking the bag was even a possibility, let alone would be a reality? It is so hard to handle curveballs when you’re fully awake and functional, it’s that much harder to do it when you’re on Benadryl or worse, and it is not easy after you have been dealing every day with problems and crises. The other lesson I get here is that once the process has gone to a certain point, once you have had the irradiation and are ready, there is no going back. You are at the mercy of the fates, and the medical staff. If the latter are not always at their best, then I hope the former will smile kindly upon Harvey and his loving and faithful Serena!
To paraphrase Robert Burns, “The best laid plans of mice and men often go awry.”
For all of their impressive policies and procedures, medical professionals are still only human, and as you said, just doing their jobs. At night, while Serena and Harvey are pouring over their research and agonizing about the profound implications of a “flagged” unit of cord blood, those who ordered and performed the infusion are sitting at home on their sofas watching American Idol, eating pizza, and voting for contestant #3 on their cell phones.
I’m not trying to demean the commitment of medical practitioners, just suggesting that they are no different than the guy who services your car, and we (the consumers of medical care) are often guilty of placing too much confidence in them. This does neither us nor them any favors.
Serena and Harvey are, by far, the most motivated parties in this endeavor, and they need to allow their motivation to extend into their relationship with the practitioners who are treating Harvey. There is no better way to ensure that Harvey will receive all the great care that he was promised.
Best wishes, you guys. I am following your story with great admiration, hope and interest.
Regards,
Grant Davis
Hi Chaya,
Long time reader, first time poster. My husband Robert was diagnosed with CLL in the fall of 2024 and I have been following CLL topics since then. I want to thank you for the great site you have created. It is the most informative CLL website I have found, bar none. We both deeply appreciate the way you break things down and your writing style. Yours is the first site we go to when we have to look anything up. Robert will most likely be getting a transplant within the next year, so we are both following Harvey’s journal with a great deal of interest. Know that you are both in our prayers.
Kindly,
Hardip
I also cringe at what Serena wrote in the “Day Zero” post. I am not only a CLL club member but also a long time RN, NP, and also a nursing instructor. I feel the need to address some of the problems stated above and in the comments.
The best institutions are on top of the non handwashing, dirty long sleeves, and “I’m above all of that” attitude. I am in an ICU at a major medical center. We have hooks outside of the ICU unit and outside each sub-unit for those white coats which have seen tons of outside material. The rounding MDs are required to roll up their shirt sleeves to the elbows when they are in the unit, whether they are examining patients just now or not. All staff are expected to wear short sleeve scrubs (“our patients deserve bare arms” is the slogan). Hand washing audits are done every week by staff on this team and a percentage of MDs, xray, lab, and staff nursing handwashing before patient contact is published each month. RNs are asked to remind physicians and others to wash their hands before they touch the patient. Sanitizing foam cleanser is by each patient’s bedside.
Because I have been a hospital staff RN for a very long time, I can say that “our” worst fear is making a mistake that will harm a patient. Persons who make life-threatening mistakes in patient care are racked with guilt and many times suffer long-term depression. That said, I would also recommend that you have a personal advocate and information checker with you when in the hospital. Having someone with you like Serena is with Harvey helps both the patient and the staff.
My best wishes to Serena and Harvey for both healing and smoother days ahead.
You are brave and wonderfuly. Your ability to sort through the shit that is happening and lean into the next day-knowing that you can’t change what happened, that you have to let people know how you feel about it, and then go on. Which you are doing. Which you have always done. Blessings on you both, Beth and John